a glimpse of sharon world...

still October 9th. it's late. u know how it is... :)

thanks to everyone for yesterday (the eighth). thanks for the icq messages, the phone calls, dinner, the piece of cake, the cards...just everything and anything that was done just to show me that u cared. even just being with me...thank you. :)

wow. nineteen. i still remember when liz turned nineteen. i thought that she was super old. and now, three years later, it's my turn. time seems to go by so fast. so many things learned, so many mistakes made, so many changes. soooooo many things that are uncertain in life. where will i be in ten years? will i even make it to being twenty? :) one thing's for sure though, God's love for me has never faltered. looking back, i see His hand guiding me through the stages of life. blessing me with the presence of those around me. placing people in my life at specific times. giving me opportunities time and time again. loving me, mistakes and all. loving me, even when i place Him at the back of my priorities list. loving me, when everything i do tells Him i don't love Him nearly as much as i should. loving me, for me. unconditionally. constantly trying to mold me into the person He wants me to be - even though many times, i resist.

why? because He is my daddy and i am His. i'm His child. His daughter. on a more personal note, lately i've been feeling as though i've been drifting again. as i sit in front of my computer typing this blog, i feel more and more shameful as i think back to all the days when i have seen my Bible by my bed but have neglected to open it. when i knew i should pray, when i knew that God was longing to talk to me, but chose not to. so a prayer request of mine would be, to really see how much i need God in my life (especially at this stage of life). not even so much as needing God. but needing God above all else in all stages of my life. I need God's presence. it's been a while since i've really, truly felt it, and i'm longing for it again. i don't need a good worship night. i don't need a good sermon. i don't need a good devotional book. i need Him. and as i type this, i'm starting to truly recognize how much i really do. i may be 19 now, but i'm still the same confused little girl i was at age 18. the same confused little girl i was at age 14. i realize that i can't do it alone. i can't keep on living like this. i need Him.

so many changes in life. thankfully i have something i can hold on to that will never change. the one constant in my life: my Heavenly Father. i pray that i will continually remind myself of this. i pray i that i will never let go of the hand of my Daddy. I've known what i've had to do long enough. it's time to take it a step further. it's time to truly take my eyes off me. won't be easy, but it's not impossible either. nineteen years. God's been waiting for me far too long...

plz continue to pray for me...don't let me forget what i just wrote...thanks all y'all. :)