in Christ alone...

...can comfort be found in times of trouble.
...can strength be found in times of weakness.
...can joy be found in times of grief.
...can peace be found in times of turmoil.
...can we be sure where we're going to spend eternity.

RIP Uncle Steven.

"...No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
Til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand."

peanut butter and JAM.

teehee...i got to play a taylor geetar today (courtesy of sam)! :) to be incredibly honest, i think i'm still too much of a beginner to really appreciate the difference between my little basic seagull S6 (oh oscar-fred, how i love you) and this fancy schmancy taylor (haha, i can see some jaws dropping right now), BUT at least i can say that i got to jam on a crazy expensive guitar, and pretend that i did. :P

note to self: two worship songs being sung simultaneously in competition-like manner makes for a really loud room, giggling, head shaking and much confusion... ;)

haha good times, good times. :)

aghhhhh.

i know that everything happens for a reason but it's really starting to get a little ridiculous. i can honestly say that this term has it has been one of the toughest terms i have ever had to deal with and go through, and while i'm thankful that i'm learning through my experiences, it has just been one thing after another...

and it's starting to take its toll on me.

____________________________________________

the serenity prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

-Reinhold Niebuhr

the end of the year is near...

hey that rhymes! that's awesome. hee hee.

despite the fact there is still snow on the ground, cold weather, more snow to come in the forecast (supposedly :P), and ice covering the sidewalks (careful out there!), i'm very conscious of the fact that my third year of university is only 6 weeks away from completion and exams are only a mere 4 weeks away. this fact makes me internally freak out every so often...there's still so much to be done it seems.

things are starting to pick up and i'm trying to catch up/stay on top of my readings and all that junk, while at the same time trying to deal with getting a plan together in my head to fulfill all the prerequisites required to apply for grad school next january. after a week of running around the science building, going to see my academic advisor multiple times, checking and rechecking stuff on the internet and dropping by the registrars office, things are starting to fall into place much better. there are still a few things that i need to work out in my head (concerning whether or not to do my internship to get my MTA), but that doesn't really need that much attention until graduation comes around. finally, i can relax a little. well...after my appointment with dr. rutherford, the biology chair, on thursday...

my decision to actually go through with this grad school thing MAY just kill me, but i'm not about to let it go without a fight.

what do i need now? focus, determination, and plenty of time to think, reflect and refresh.

"all that remains is me and who i am at the end of the day."

(on a side note, toby lightman is really good. i really like her stuff...i've been listening to her almost non-stop the last couple of days.) :)

seatbelts.

i still remember when i was younger i would sometimes go into my parent's bedroom, and run up to my mom's desk where she sat in her swivel chair doing her work, turn her chair around so she faced me, say "seatbelt! seatbelt!" and she'd laugh, let me onto her lap and hug me really tightly...seatbelts were the greatest. actually, they still are. (and no, i don't care that i'm 21. i think everyone needs them from time to time.) :P

anyway, so i was thinking about my testimony today and as i sat there thinking of the story of how i became a Christian i couldn't help but go back to that moment and thinking about how i was as a ten year old. and to be perfectly honest, i don't know what God saw in me. even now, i'm not sure what He sees in me. but for some reason He saw something; He sees something.

so imperfect, yet loved. so lacking, yet still loved. so underserving, yet so loved.

needless to say all these thoughts running through my mind at the same time, made me feel a little overwhelmed, so i did what any child would do: i ran to my Father, while He sat there though He had a million other things to do, He helped me climb onto his lap, held me and listened as my deepest thoughts and feelings about everything, flowed out of my heart.

and i felt safe. and so loved. i got a much needed seatbelt from God tonight. :) Adonai, great are You.

"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone;
my hope comes from him.
He alone is my rock and my salvation;
He is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
My salvation and my honor depend on God [a] ;
He is my mighty rock, my refuge.
Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your hearts to him,
for God is our refuge.
Selah" - psalm 62:5-8

post-reading week

this year's reading week was maybe one of the best ones i've had in all the years i've been in university. :) all my midterms and tests were the week before reading week, with the exception of one assignment, so basically i had a whole week of doing absolutely nothing. i didn't even bring any textbooks home. sweetness.

started off really well with the LCCF retreat. the fellowship that we shared there was really great although at times it was quite...uhmm....interesting. ;) hehehe. nevertheless, it was an awesome time, and the timing couldn't have been any better.

God really knows what we need, and when we need it.

during reading week itself, i spent a lot of time with my mommy and that's always a plus. rented the movie, Ray, and watched it twice (once with justin, and then again with my mom). GREAT movie. i really liked it a lot. jamie foxx did an awesome job in playing ray in the movie. wanna get me some ray charles cds now. the special features that came with the dvd were also really good. hmm. maybe i'll invest in that movie. maybe. ;)

wednesday night was also fun. we went to mel lastman square to take advantage of the free ice rink. good times! highlight of the night: when chen broke nevin's skate. i have his confession on video courtesy of justin and his awesome camera skills. hahaha. there are also some really nice pictures that justin took. i have yet to get off my butt and upload all the pics from reading week. i'll let you know when i get on that. ooh ohh! and hannah taught me how to do crossovers. hahaha. i really suck, but that's okay, at least it was fun. must make a note to sharpen my skates. they're duller than spoons.

thursday i went for dinner with leo, and as usual it was great getting a chance to catch up with him again. when's the next time i'll see you leo? what was that? april? haha. (oh! leo, after i left your house i ended up going back to the gas station and filled up on gas. good thing too, because the next day it went from 73.7 to 79.9. ahahaha. sweeeeet.) afterwards, i stopped by dan's house b.c there was a small gathering of people there, and there we had dessert! mmmmmm. yummy mccain cake and mint chocolate icecream. (thanks for having us over dan!) it was a great way to end off a great day. :)

on the friday i went to pickle barrel with justin, jo, jer, ken and lil. it was really awesome seeing them all again. especially lillian. :) i haven't seen that girl in like forever! (seriously. i think that the last time was in the summer when lil, pheebs and i went to taste of japan...mmmmmmmmm... :d ) it was nice talking with her again and doing a bit of catching up. it's nice knowing that even though we went our separate ways and went to two different universities, the friendship still exists. :)

anyway, that's all for now. there's more to say, but currently i have no words for the thoughts that are currently occupying my brain. hope that everyone had a great reading week too, and that the week back has been good to them. all the best to those who are still writing their midterms. study hard! :)