Carla

When I was seventeen I spent about a week on a native reserve in BC and while I was there I met the sweetest little girl, Carla. She must have been about 6 or 7 back then and had one of those contagious smiles that light up your whole face. I distinctly remember hearing her shout, "Shaaaarrrronnnnnn!" while running down the road towards me one morning with the hugest smile on her face; That was one of the best moments. I had never been on anything like that trip before - I remember feeling so much joy while I was there and literally cried on the plane home.

This morning, fifteen years later, K picked up my photo album and handed it to me saying, "Read this please," probably thinking it was a book. As I looked through the pictures I couldn't help but linger on a few of them, remembering and attempting to put the fuzzier memories into focus. It's been a long time since I've thought about that trip and the kids there that are now fifteen years older, and I can't help but wonder where they are and who they have become. They were all innocent little kids growing up in a harsh environment where they were at a disadvantage right from the start. My memories of them are hazy now, but Carla sticks out for me and I hope with all my heart that she is thriving. I really hope this for all of them.

Exit Seeking

I feel like I've been stuck in a hole that I can't get out of lately. Hopefully I'll find my way out soon.

Book Nook: The Magicians

The Magicians
Lev Grossman

I had high hopes for this book; According to this random book recommendation list I stumbled across on the internet, this book was recommended for those who liked the Harry Potter series. Well I loved the Harry Potter universe, but this magical world just wasn't...magical.

The story centres around the protagonist, Quentin Coldwater, who is searching for meaning in his life (to put things very loosely). He generally reads like an immature, depressed, entitled brat who isn't able to find satisfaction in anything or anyone. Sure, sometimes characters will start off like this, but generally they become a better version of themselves by the end of the book. Nope, not this guy; he still very much sucks just as much (if not more) than he did at the beginning. It was hard not to let the stupidness of Quentin get in the way of the storyline, but the storyline (which at the beginning seemed so full of potential) turned out to be weird and disappointing too. This isn't to say that there were no good parts at all (because there were a few), but the bad ones just outweighed the good.

Apparently this book is a book one of a trilogy, but I won't be reading the rest of them. 2/5 and this is me being generous.

Running Update Update

I did it! I jogged for 25 minutes straight and it was a success; Didn't need to stop at any point and basically jogged continuously for 3.5K! Sweet! Needless to say I was a sweaty mess when I walked through the front door, but I had a huge smile on my face and didn't feel like I was going to die so I'll take it. Yay!

Update: I went for a run in the evening and was supposed to do another 25 minutes straight jog again, but I couldn't do it. About 15 minutes in I was dying and had to take a walk break. Even though I wasn't able to do it I'm still glad I was out there instead of on the couch! Silver linings, silver linings.

Running Update

Yesterday I went for the longest run in the history of ever (for me). I was following my 5K running trainer thing and I just about died halfway through the first jogging section because the stupid street I was on kept going uphill, but I made it through. So far the longest I've jogged continuously has been 8 minutes, but for the next workout (I'm starting week 7 already!) I'm supposed to do 25 minutes. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous about it, but I'll just try my best and do as much as I can.

In other news I downloaded the Nike Running App on my phone and I love it! I may or may not have fist pumped the sky in victory when the app announced "5 kilometres" in my headphones. My first 5K! I did it!

Cookie Monster

I made 20 peanut butter-oatmeal-chocolate chip cookies yesterday. Yum! J ate one, K doesn't like them so she didn't eat any, and O doesn't have any teeth as of yet. As of right now there are 2 left. Oops.

In other news, I need to go for a run tonight...

Kyrie Eleison

Lord, have mercy on us.

Toxicity Be Gone

Someone in my life recently commented, "You know, you're not the same person you were ever since you got married," in the most non-complimentary of ways. This isn't the first time to have heard something like this from said person.

While this, and other statements like this, may once have caused the kind of reaction this person was hoping to get from me (read: guilt, shame), I actually took this statement to be a great compliment.

This year I will have been married for six years. S i x. In these six years I have become a mother of two, I have lost family members to disease and age, and I have had to deal with more than my share of drama drama drama (more often than not caused by the person who repeatedly states said comment and others like it). As a result of living life (read: growing up) I have lost some of my naivety, become a stronger person for it, and have come to the realization that the problem isn't so much that I am not the same person I was before (honestly, no one should be after this much time and the events that have taken place). No, the real problem is that someone else thinks that this is a problem; The greatest thing about this realization is knowing that this time, the problem is not mine. 

Boom.

Running Adventures: Update

It's been more than a month since I started running and today seems like a good time for an update. Good news: I'm still running! I've been generally going out at least 3 times a week since I started with the exception of a 2 week rest period (too eager + too soon = overused knee complete with knee pain). I'm still going through the C25K thing and so far things have been good (tiring, but good). I completed the first workout of week 4 on Tuesday and I'm super happy to report that I can now jog for 5 minutes straight! (I know this is nothing for a lot of people, but for someone who had no endurance and was barely able to run 60 seconds straight back in April, this is a big deal, lol.) Now this is progress.

Book Nook: Tell The Wolves I'm Home

Tell The Wolves I'm Home
Carol Rifka Brunt

Prior to this book, I had started two other books but didn't finish either of them because I couldn't get into their stories and then I got too bored to continue. Luckily, third time's a charm because this one got my attention from the first chapter until the very end and beyond. (Yup, I kept thinking about this one after I had finished it. It was like when I read Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix and all I could think about for the next three weeks was Sirius Black. True story.)

This novel is coming of age story that deals with grief, loneliness, insecurity, jealousy, relationships, family, and love. It centres around June, the protagonist, who loses her favourite uncle who was her best friend. This loss is central to the story but is not the whole story thanks to the introduction of other relationships that continually develop and evolve throughout the book. I was taken in by the characters and thought the storyline was well-crafted and thought out. The content itself is pretty heavy at times and covers a lot of ground, but it's done in a way where the reader isn't completely depressed and deflated after reading it. Instead, it's really touching and almost hopeful at times.

Overall, I'd give it a 4.5/5. Great read! I definitely recommend it, just maybe have some kleenex on hand...it'll likely make you teary.